{"id":10271,"date":"2019-12-08T12:41:43","date_gmt":"2019-12-08T17:41:43","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/moriahjovan.com\/talesofdunham\/?p=10271"},"modified":"2026-02-24T14:49:00","modified_gmt":"2026-02-24T19:49:00","slug":"bye-bye-granny-i-love-you","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/moriahjovan.com\/talesofdunham\/blog\/bye-bye-granny-i-love-you\/","title":{"rendered":"Bye bye, Granny. I love you."},"content":{"rendered":"<p><figure id=\"attachment_16398\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-16398\" style=\"width: 349px\" class=\"wp-caption alignright\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\" wp-image-16398\" src=\"https:\/\/moriahjovan.com\/talesofdunham\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/12\/20191208_granny.jpg\" alt=\"An image of a maroon 1996 Oldsmobile Cutlass Ciera with peeling clear-coat.\" width=\"349\" height=\"262\"><figcaption id=\"caption-attachment-16398\" class=\"wp-caption-text\">Granny. Her name is Granny.<\/figcaption><\/figure>Sold my car today. The ad is gone now, but it generated lots of interest, and some people said they\u2019d buy it just because of the ad. Hey, folks! Buy my books if you want better stories! Behold Granny:<!--more--><\/p>\n<p class=\"separator\">\u2605\u2605\u2605<\/p>\n<p>Let me introduce you to Granny. Yes, she IS your granddad\u2019s Oldsmobile. She looks like she\u2019s been rode hard and put away wet, and, like any cranky old lady, she has her issues and she needs a bath (I\u2019ll clean her up before you arrive), but relatively speaking, for a 23-year-old car, she\u2019s awesome.<\/p>\n<p class=\"subheadbiob\">PROs<\/p>\n<ul class=\"post\">\n<li class=\"post\">3.8-liter V6, thus much get-up-and-go<\/li>\n<li class=\"post\">only 174,000 miles<\/li>\n<li class=\"post\">dependable<\/li>\n<li class=\"post\">newish brakes &lt;6 months<\/li>\n<li class=\"post\">newish tires &lt;18 months<\/li>\n<li class=\"post\">lots of trunk room<\/li>\n<li class=\"post\">roomy interior<\/li>\n<li class=\"post\">quiet<\/li>\n<li class=\"post\">state-of-the-art cassette player<\/li>\n<li class=\"post\">clean title<\/li>\n<li class=\"post\">cheap to insure<\/li>\n<li class=\"post\">good gas mileage for tooling around, great gas mileage for road tripping<\/li>\n<li class=\"post\">runs cool<\/li>\n<li class=\"post\">great heater and defroster (the defroster squeals)<\/li>\n<li class=\"post\">back window defrost<\/li>\n<li class=\"post\">front-wheel drive<\/li>\n<li class=\"post\">GREAT SNOW CAR!!!<\/li>\n<li class=\"post\">power windows<\/li>\n<li class=\"post\">headliner has been replaced<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p class=\"subheadbiob\">CONS<\/p>\n<ul class=\"post\">\n<li class=\"post\">NO AIR CONDITIONING!!! (Now, look. That went out 10 years ago and I thought, \u201cNot gonna spend a ton of money because she\u2019s old and it\u2019s only unbearably hot 3 months out of the year\u201d [you\u2019d think I\u2019d learned after spending only 51 years here]. But if I\u2019d gotten that done then, it would have amortized out at $70 year.)<\/li>\n<li class=\"post\">buzzing speakers<\/li>\n<li class=\"post\">fuel door spring is sprung (XY tax deduction did it), so it\u2019s taped shut with clear packing tape (and I will throw in the roll of tape and dispenser for free!)<\/li>\n<li class=\"post\">front passenger window is off its track<\/li>\n<li class=\"post\">front passenger floor gets wet when it rains hard because of the above issue<\/li>\n<li class=\"post\">front passenger door is difficult to open from the outside<\/li>\n<li class=\"post\">driver\u2019s door power panel fell off and is now Gorilla-glued together<\/li>\n<li class=\"post\">driver\u2019s door handle (inside) has been replaced (by me) (not well)<\/li>\n<li class=\"post\">ashtray drawer is sprung (XY did that too)<\/li>\n<li class=\"post\">cigarette lighter plug doesn\u2019t work<\/li>\n<li class=\"post\">back windows go down only half way (stupid child \u201csafety\u201d features)<\/li>\n<li class=\"post\">horn only works at 2:17 p.m. the third Sunday of May, August, November if you hold your mouth right<\/li>\n<li class=\"post\">shifter indicator doesn\u2019t land in the right spot (i.e., you\u2019re in D but it says N)<\/li>\n<li class=\"post\">various dents and dings and scratches (the poor teenage girl who hit me was very happy when I told her to forget about it and go about her merry business\u2014she still had to explain HER dent to her parents, though)<\/li>\n<li class=\"post\">doesn\u2019t lock, like, at all (but \u2026 would you really care?)<\/li>\n<li class=\"post\">she looks like shit and she needs a bath<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>I am Granny\u2019s 3rd owner. I have been driving her for 20 years, 16 of which I worked at home. When I stopped having to drive to a job, she had about 150,000 miles. She now has 174,000 miles. 25,000 miles. 16 years. Do the math.<\/p>\n<p>She once did a straight-through round trip from Kansas City to Twin Falls, Idaho in 4 days. That was an adventure, let me tell you, but I got a husband out of it.<\/p>\n<p>I believe that was the second or third cross-country trip she\u2019s made, but it\u2019s been 20 years. Why do you expect me to remember everything?!<\/p>\n<p>My point: She can take mountain passes like a champ and yes, I\u2019d trust her to road trip now, but husband says no.<\/p>\n<p>Now, far be it from me to tell you why you need to buy my beloved Granny car, but she is a steal at $500. If I were a frugal young stay-at-home mom and needed a second car for doctor visits and grocery shopping and whatnot, Granny would be perfect. After all, she\u2019s just been tooling around the metro a couple of times a week for the last 16 years.<\/p>\n<p>I love her, but my husband is making me get rid of her. Now we have 3 cars and a truck for 2 drivers and he just doesn\u2019t love Granny the way I love Granny. He says he doesn\u2019t want to pay the pittance in insurance and license\/registration for her anymore. Also, my neighbors give me the side-eye, but they\u2019ve only been doing that for 14 years. Also also, my tax deductions are embarrassed that I pick them up in it. Fine. Walk home.<\/p>\n<p>You must understand. I adore my Granny car. I would keep her and drive her until the wheels fell off (not likely, since they\u2019re practically new), but it is time to let her go bless a family who needs a cheap ride with only minor problems (so far as I know). I\u2019m only asking $500, which hurts because to me she is priceless.<\/p>\n<p>If you take her home, you must promise me you will not change her name. Her name is Granny. And I love her. Maybe you will too.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Sold my car today. The ad is gone now, but it generated lots of interest, and some people said they\u2019d buy it just because of the ad. Hey, folks! Buy my books if you want better stories! Behold Granny:<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"ngg_post_thumbnail":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[578,87,476,579],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-10271","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-lovely-things","category-money","category-musings","category-nostalgia"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/moriahjovan.com\/talesofdunham\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/10271"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/moriahjovan.com\/talesofdunham\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/moriahjovan.com\/talesofdunham\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/moriahjovan.com\/talesofdunham\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/moriahjovan.com\/talesofdunham\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=10271"}],"version-history":[{"count":12,"href":"https:\/\/moriahjovan.com\/talesofdunham\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/10271\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":23948,"href":"https:\/\/moriahjovan.com\/talesofdunham\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/10271\/revisions\/23948"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/moriahjovan.com\/talesofdunham\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=10271"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/moriahjovan.com\/talesofdunham\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=10271"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/moriahjovan.com\/talesofdunham\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=10271"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}